top of page

Sophie

Mason

they/them

Chief Executive Officer

ThinkEDI

I’m a Woman, and Yet I Prefer They/Them Pronouns

Sophie Mason

January 2025

I’m a woman, and yet I prefer they/them pronouns. It’s not just some “woke” phrase to me (though let’s be real—woke should be a compliment, not a slur). It’s always been my preference, but for the longest time, I didn’t feel like I was allowed to say it.


You see, I grew up being told what being a woman should look like, sound like, and act like—and none of it really felt like me. I’m proud of my identity as a woman, but she/her never quite fit. Those words feel loaded with expectations, biases, and stereotypes that I’ve spent my whole life pushing against. So, when I ask to be called they/them, it’s not about rejecting who I am—it’s about claiming the space to be who I truly am.


Why They/Them?


For me, it’s about more than just language. Being referred to as she/her often comes with a weight that feels limiting. Growing up, I constantly heard gendered language used to diminish women:


  • “She’s too emotional for that role.”

  • “She can’t handle the pressure.”

  • “She’s just being difficult.”


Even in casual conversation, it felt dismissive. Remember that old saying, “Who’s she? The cat’s mother?” My neurodivergent brain has never made sense of it (seriously, what does that even mean?), but the lesson was clear: calling someone “she” could be impolite, reductive, or even dismissive. If you knew someone’s name, you should use it.


That idea stuck with me. To this day, I cringe when people reduce me to she/her. I am not just she. I am Sophie. Or they.

[Image description: A hand is holding a pink card in their hand that says 'They/Them' the writing is blue and the background of the image is turquoise.]

[Image description: A hand is holding a pink card in their hand that says 'They/Them' the writing is blue and the background of the image is turquoise.]

They/Them Feels Equal


Here’s another truth: only 2% of venture capital funding goes to female entrepreneurs. Just 2%! Women are still fighting to be taken seriously in leadership, to have their ideas valued, and to secure the same opportunities as men.

When I walk into a room, I often feel the weight of this inequity. The way people view me, speak to me, or underestimate me often ties back to my gender. Being called they/them feels like shedding that weight. It’s like saying:


  • “I’m here, and I belong.”

  • “I’m not defined by your assumptions about women.”

  • “I deserve this space, just like anyone else.”


For me, they/them isn’t about rejecting my identity as a woman. It’s about rejecting the inequities and limitations society still attaches to that identity.


Pronouns Carry Power


Language is powerful, and pronouns are no exception. They’re not just words—they reflect how we see and respect each other. Misgendering someone (even unintentionally) can make them feel invisible, like their identity doesn’t matter.

On the flip side, using someone’s preferred pronouns is an act of recognition. It’s saying, “I see you for who you are.” For me, being addressed as they/them feels like someone is seeing all of me—not just the parts that fit neatly into society’s boxes.


It’s Not Just About Me


Using they/them isn’t just about my personal comfort. It’s also about pushing back against the stereotypes and stigmas tied to gender.


  • It’s about challenging the idea that women are “too emotional” or “not assertive enough” for leadership.

  • It’s about creating space for nonbinary folks, who are often overlooked or misgendered.

  • It’s about reminding people that we’re more than our gender—we’re individuals with unique strengths, stories, and perspectives.


When I share my pronouns, I’m making space not just for myself but for anyone who’s ever felt boxed in by gendered expectations

[Image description: The image shows Sophie, a smiling woman with shoulder-length blonde, wavy hair, sitting at in their wheelchair. They are wearing a gold top, red blazer and black trousers, and is holding a microphone.]

I’m a Woman, and Yet I Prefer They/Them Pronouns

It’s Okay to Ask Questions


If you’re new to the idea of sharing pronouns or using they/them for someone, it’s okay to feel unsure. What matters is that you’re willing to learn and try. I’ve had plenty of conversations with people who’ve asked, “Why does it matter so much to you?” And my answer is always the same:


It matters because language shapes how we see the world and each other. And when we use language that respects and uplifts people, we help create a world where everyone feels valued and seen.


I’m a woman. I’m proud of my identity. But I am not she. I am Sophie. Or they.

Sharing my pronouns isn’t about rejecting femininity—it’s about rejecting the stereotypes and limitations tied to it. It’s about equity, respect, and making space for myself and others. This is my preference.


If this idea resonates with you—or even challenges you—I encourage you to explore it further. Start by asking people their pronouns, listening to their stories, and reflecting on how language shapes your interactions.


Together, we can create a world where everyone feels seen and respected. And honestly, isn’t that something worth working toward?

bottom of page